It was Champagne in limousines, always part of a crazy scene. Rock ‘n’ Roll is what I was told, orgies, friendships, acquaintances who wanted to be part of the non-stop trip.

Love was never to be found, but empty promises and alcohol were in great amount, surrounded, it always felt like I was part of a movie scene. But here I am, fast asleep.

The outline is clear, I’ll stop right here, I’ll extinguish, obliterate, eradicate this destiny unfulfilled. It does not exist, it simply resists.

Luci

I want to be your passenger, let’s drive to a city called despair, we’ll forget who we are until it’s time to remember. The horizon ahead, distance behind, this is a ride to a place far beyond repair. Transport, movement, a vehicle used to explore our thoughts which navigates through a lifestyle too confusing, disconcerting, distracting and embarrassing to bare.

Luci

It’s an attraction, a conscious reaction to thoughts of what you’d like to do if I was with you. There are glances in this direction, my direction, with stares too hard to bare. But it won’t progress, as our thoughts undress our actions suppress. These thoughts offer our mundane lives wild distractions, through neon patterns coloured so bright we quietly take note of what it’s like to be alive. Anticipation kneads our minds with ideas of how we should really spend this night.

Luci

It can be exhausting having you around, you’re there to play and entertain but all you do is keep me awake. You’ve forced my days to pass quicker than a fit of rage. Twenty four seven, there’s a film at eleven.

You’re too hard to disguise, you’re thirty two inches wide, bigger than the wardrobe which sits proudly by your side.

You relay, you replay and you take centre stage, but it’s all black and white. You project life through distorted notions, canned laughter, re-runs, studio lighting and a camera which adds fifty pounds.

Luci

Blurbs dominate conversations, with words becoming sentences too hard to follow. I talk too much but I can’t resist the urge to regale you with stories you’ve already heard. Thoughts and ideas need to be spread, read and followed like a thread too long at the seams. It does seem that the topic at hand is all about me, the mind has no say, my life has always been this way. Like a delinquent with nothing to drink late into the night; I realise that, I’m just empty inside.

Luci

We’re defined by the threads that we wear, and the circles that we choose. We’re unique, we’re individuals, we’re a mystery, we’re our art, we’re our shoes. We’re all about the neighbourhood where we reside, and the bar that we choose on a Friday night. We’re a label, we’re a scene, we’re a haircut away from being too cool to eat.

Luci

I have no regrets about the time that we first met, and all the money that I’ve spent. Because my obsession with you is all that I have left. You’ve left me breathless, climbing the stairs with a look of despair and a cough here and there.

But I don’t care.

Life tells me that you’re bad for me, that you’ve become my occupation, but I prefer to think of you as my fascination.

I’m full of adoration.

You’re something that I need to believe in, because I know deep down, that you won’t be the one to ever leave me…

Luci

You can read me by the bookmarks that I have made on my Safari web browser, which I still need to update. I’m trapped by the music choices that I’ve made, it’s Kate Bush to OMD, and a few too many love songs heavily out of date. If I had a diary, I’d tear out the pages of my past mistakes, but bookmarks on my Safari web browser don’t seem to go away. It’s the choice I’ve made, I’m to blame for the people I chose to date and the songs which I’d play.

Luci

In the beginning we’re both bound by nerves, but that’s because we haven’t quite met. You’ll want an introduction, but I’d rather embark on it as if it were an adventure. You’ll write to me wanting to impress, I’ll write back expecting the greatest story I’ve ever read. You’ll ask for more pictures, I’ll oblige but they won’t be of me undressed.

Hours turn to days, and days turn into weeks, with our eyes pressed to our screens, waiting to meet…

Luci

I was dancing throughout the night, with the music playing to the left and sometimes to the right. She told me to leave my rose tinted glasses behind, I’d see the world in a different light. She said she would lead me to Mayfair where the streets were quite sublime, I’d sample and see things which would blow my mind. We’d walk whilst we talked, then halt at number nine, a place which would become, a favourite of mine…

Luci